Part of yesterday’s agony was the knowledge that after a night of stillness I would wake up today in even more pain. And it proved to be true. My trainer told me not to get up today and curse her name, and I’m proud to say that I kept my promise not to do that. No bad words from me!!! I think I might have said something about wishing she would explode, but there are no bad words in that, right? But really, all kidding aside, I’m proud that I got through my session. After a two year battle with a debilitating illness, I’m just glad I could do any of it. The fact that it hurts so much just proves to me that she wasn’t wasting my time.

I don’t know the names of all my muscles, but I am acutely aware of each of them today. Who knew the muscle on the front of my shoulder could hurt so much? Or for that matter, who knew how often I actually use that muscle? Blow drying my hair today took courage and determination.

And sitting down!!! I’m not sure yet which hurts more: sitting down or getting back up. The sitting part is a delicate procedure in which I have to decide how far to lower myself before I drop. It’s a battle between how much it hurts my thighs to support my weight and how much it will hurt to land if I let go too soon. I can’t use my arms to help me, because the backs of them hurt even more than my legs. Phillip actually called me a zombie today because of the way I walked to the kitchen.

But, those of you who know me and care will be delighted to know that I haven’t given up. I got up and made a huge breakfast for the family, and I fully intend to help Phill put Noah’s new furniture together later. And I will be in the gym on Monday morning! I know now that I can survive a hard workout, so my gentler version should be a breeze.


~ by Rachel McMahon on November 13, 2010.

One Response to “Ouch++”

  1. You’re doing great! Stay strong.

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